Sunday, July 7, 2024

CENTER POINT  (The Middle Way) 

 



Photo credit: Smithsonian 


CENTER POINT

(The Middle Way) 


Life is constantly mirroring back to us what we need to see. Each of the things we see… OUT there… reflect back to us what is going on INside of us. It may show up as a, “I want that/or I like that.” or “I don’t want that/or I don't like that.” Inquiry is a gentle way to begin looking at things like this, that may trigger us.   

There are lots of things that stir up contrasting opinions. Politics seems to be one that most people can relate to lately. In recent examples of US politics, people saw a wide variety of things.... from authoritarian to defender. Either “I like this” or “I don't like this.” This is simply an example, but can be applied to every day things... such as a rainy day. 

These contrasting characteristics, are like two sides of the same coin.... or a pendulum that swings back and forth over a center point. The center point of a pendulum is called the equilibrium position.

There is an equilibrium position inside of us. A place where there is thought without judgment. No suffering. No resistance. Discernment. These are all just words... maybe one of those may resonate with you.

This allows us to be in the world but not of it. It can be called the Middle Way. An internal guidance system. It informs when something doesn’t feel right. The “pendulum” has swung off center. 

Taking action from this “clear” place allows us to address things that are needed IN the world... but allow us to not be OF the world... not be caught emotionally. Being caught emotionally may move us to action, but it may or may not be “right” action. No judgment... simply a suggestion to look... notice what is the motivation or intention in actions taken. 

Sometimes we are often not aware of this place in us... or feel as though it is inaccessible. It is like it has become hidden…. buried…. or muffled. What do we do about that?

Some people meditate, read, do yoga, go to retreats…. I did all of those for many, MANY (MANY!) years. Mindful Integration is a practice... a set of tools that gently looks at the pain that may be obscuring the internal guidance system. The Practice meets you where you are.



Saturday, June 10, 2023

Change is in the Air

Quote of the month:

You are today
where your thoughts have brought you;
you will be tomorrow
where your thoughts take you.
- James Allen


**Please note: this post is out of order. 🤷‍♀️
It it originally from fall of 2008.

Change is in the air….
Change is certainly in the air here in Minnesota. It was 74* one day…then just a few days later, the wind chills were at zero and the flurries were flying! Much of the country either is or already has experienced fall. The changing leaves are a good analogy for emotional changes in our lives..... Looking at what does and does not work for us…and allowing those things that are not serving us to change or to fall away….just as the leaves do.

For the last couple of months we have been talking about becoming aware and identifying those areas of your life that are causing you stress and that you wish to experience differently. Some changes are simple….you acquire new information, integrate it into your understanding…and move on. For example, before a child learns addition, they may say 2+2=22 or 2+2=fish for that matter (my boys went through a time when they thought this was hysterical!) At some point a teacher shows the child 2 pieces of candy, adds 2 more to them. The child counts them and learns that 2+2=4!

Sometimes the changes come simply like the child learning mathematics. It is like you are hearing things you always knew, but had forgotten for a while. When you hear them, they resonate as truth. That information is easy to integrate and implement. The child has little or no fear, identification or emotional attachment to 2+2=22, so it is relatively simple to integrate that information. Change is more challenging when you do have some sort of fear, identification or attachment to what it is that you are trying to change. We discussed identification in more detail in November‘s post. As always, on this blog, my intention will be to keep my suggestions “simple,” understandable and do-able.

It is important to understand that the only person you can really effect lasting change on, is yourself. You might be able to change a situation, or may be able convince someone that they need to change for a while….but in the end, the only person you have any real control over is yourself. That really is the good news as it opens up a world of possibilities to you about how you experience your life!

You know I like to keep it “simple,” so for an example, I am going to use concerns over writing a blog. The same process can be applied to just about any situation that is causing you stress, such as beginning any other new endeavor, changing jobs, dealing with a difficult co-worker or family member, managing your finances, or preparing for the holidays.

The first thing I would suggest is to pause your mental “I-pod/tape” and see what is going on in your head about the situation. What are you telling yourself about the new endeavor? Sometimes these types of things are more difficult to hear. They happen so rapidly and so automatically that it is challenging to slow down to a point that it is discernible. [This is another example of how meditation and awareness can help.]

I use a method that I call
The Why? Process….

  • Start asking yourself why? In the example: Why am I hesitant to start a blog? Are you saying things like, “I can’t learn something new,” or “I’m not up to date on technology," or "I am not a good writer.”


  • It is useful to be as specific as possible. Ask why? a number of times. It helps to clarify what is really going on. If you say you don't like new things….ask why again? Try to clarify further. Is it because it is unknown? Or is it because it is tiring to learn something new? Or some other reason. The question is….. why is it that way FOR YOU vs. why it might be that way for me. Nearly everyone would agree that new things may be scary and may create stress in your life, but the reasons why it would be considered stressful, would be as numerous as there are people! Continuing the example of the blog, some may think they are not up to date on technology, others may think they don’t have anything to say, or that they are not good with grammar. Other reasons might be that no one will read it, no one cares what they think or that they are not smart enough.


  • Continue until you seem to be saying the same answer to each why? Let’s say you get to a point where you say, you are afraid you won’t be successful at the new endeavor and that seems to be a recurring answer.


  • The next step is to make a list of all the times your life that you have been successful. (After your why process, you may have a different word (fear) such as smart or won't be liked, or something similar. I use successful as it is a common theme and one that can be adapted to a variety of situations.) I like a written list so you can go back to it. List as many as possible. Have you completed high school or college? Have you moved? Changed jobs? Had sports accomplishments? Other accomplishments or awards at work, school or maybe in a club or an organization? Other personal achievements?… brag on yourself until you can’t think of anything more. No one is listening but you! Everyone has at least a few things that can put on this list. Graduating high school, raising a child, taking a new job, dealing with a challenging situation like an illness or death of a loved one, or other loss such as a divorce, going through a hurricane or other natural disaster, learning something new, such as karate, a new language or playing the trombone. I suspect that once you get started, you may be surprised at how many successful accomplishments you will have on your list.

  • Is there one on the list that is similar to the new challenge you are facing now? Is there one that you found particularly challenging...but had success at it anyway? Is there one thing that you feel particular proud of? Is there one that beforehand felt impossible or that you were concerned about your ability to handle it....but did it anyway? Put that into your words!

The bottom line....
Try to remember either one thing that stands out or a generalized feeling from the cumulative effect of all the things on your list.....sit with that feeling for a little while and focus your attention on the positive situations where you have been successful.


Then....
Try to put into your own words what that feels like.

Those are your True Colors!

I'll stop here for now......this next part of the process will be the topic for next month’s blog. Here are some lyrics to the song True Colors,

"I see your true colors shining through....
...so don't be afraid,
to let them show,
your true colors are beautiful,
like a rainbow."

If you would like to hear Cyndi sing it to you.... click here for a link….

To continue reading the next post, click here, for True Colors.

I would love to hear your feedback as well as any questions you may have or topics you may be interested in for the future. You may comment at the bottom of the blog in the "comments" section. All posts will be archived on my blog along with other useful information at:
Simply Spirituality or
http://simplyspirituality.blogspot.com/

Until next month....
Here's hoping you keep your spirituality simple!
Penelope


Picture of the month:


I can do it! Florida, July 2003

Saturday, October 10, 2020

This Isn't Right


A few days ago, I posted the drawing, below, of Trump on Facebook.. It could be described as ugly and unflattering. I asked people to comment on what they saw.

You can see that post and comments here.
https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10223617876858974&id=1352621703

The answers were interesting… a very broad spectrum from the expected, ugly comments… all the way to compassion. I would like to suggest that the world is a huge mirror for us right now. Not just politics… it spreads worldwide with the virus and also social justice movements.

Simply…
What we see out there…. is what is IN here. Inside us. It’s what we are carrying around.

I can hear a number of you right now saying… that I’m crazy. I see a crazy lunatic in the Oval Office of the US. That’s not inside me.

Let me ask you? How do you FEEL about a crazy lunatic in the oval office? What part of you is saying, “This isn’t right.” “It shouldn’t be this way.”

That is the part INside you that is being triggered.

The Kiloby Inquiries are a simple, gentle way to begin looking at these types of things. It’s a process that meets you where you are. 

Afterwards…. I still see a crazy lunatic in the Oval Office, but I am no longer triggered, frightened, upset by that. A word of caution… this is not a once and done type of thing. Once that no longer concerns you…. don’t worry. There will be something else. You’ll know when you start staying…. “I can’t believe he did…. WHAT?!?!” 

Happy Inquiring

Thursday, August 20, 2020

Size Matters.... or does it?


There is a lot of talk about “trauma” these days. There are two types, “Big T” and “little t” trauma.

Big T trauma is easy to see. There has been an accident or abuse. Something BIG happened. It is defined as an experience that produces injury or pain. Some synonyms are ordeal, jolt or upheaval.

Other synonyms of trauma more closely describe little t, like disturbance, strain, upset or stress.  Now we are getting closer to the little t experience. Maybe a sibling or classmate picked on you, maybe a parent or relative pushed you to succeed or follow in their footsteps. Think about your own little t experiences.

Does it have to be categorized as one of these two? I would suggest that trauma is NOT either big or small, but falls along more of a spectrum of experience. Labeling trauma as big or small somehow pigeon holes an expectation of what the experience “should” be. You suffered abuse, you “should” be messed up. Or, you had a “normal” childhood, so what's your problem? Moreover, where it lands on that spectrum, is subject to our personal interpretation of that experience.

For example, I have worked with someone who has given me permission to share a little about their story. This person suffered sexual abuse at the hands of her mother's boyfriend. It was just one time, when he was asked to babysit her, but it was overnight and they were alone. This person was trusted, but not completely. When the abuse happened, the young girl made up a story in her mind. The story explained that there was something wrong with him, that he had a problem. Very little about the incident was taken on, personally, by her identity. There is still some work to do, to remove the story that is there, but it did not result in what would have typically been considered to be a big T trauma.

In contrast, I see small t trauma as the “meat and potatoes” of trauma experiences in that they affect our lives very consistently and can almost go unnoticed. They often can “fly under the radar” so to speak or feel more like an annoyance than a problem. Returning to the spectrum, removes any expectation about what an experience “should” be. A person is free to experience their life, just as it is. Some examples of small t may come from being told what to believe, anger expressed by a parent, “the look” or the tone a parent uses.

How might this play out in every day life?

Let's imagine, for example, an overly critical parent. Maybe you did not dress the way they wanted you to or maybe they criticized how you did a household chore. Let's say this was a pattern of behavior. You did your best, but it was seen as not good enough or not right. You were bothered, tried harder, but to no avail. What happens?

Your mind will create a story to deal with this. Scott Kiloby calls this a “deficiency story.” It is a way to help you make sense of, and cope with your experience of the world. What would your story be in this situation?

When you are older, you work in an office. In general, you like your work, but one day the boss critiques something you have prepared. It's not “too bad.” It needs a few things changed. Then the boss begins to explain what needs to be corrected. What happens now? Imagine yourself in this situation for a moment. What do you do? There is no right or wrong answer.

For purposes of this example, what happen is the deficiency story is triggered. The person in this example then REACTS rather than RESPONDING. I have intentionally not defined the deficiency story in this example. I wonder if your mind made one up based on your own experience? Did it also formulate a reaction to the boss in this scenario? The more I work with different people, it is very clear that we each interpret our experience through the filter of our mind. This isn't a new idea, but what is new, is the nuance with which each of us do this. One person may lash out while another may silently seethe inside.

This is an example of how an unresolved trauma from somewhere in the middle of the spectrum, can affect us years later. Using Inquiry, specifically the @KilobyInquiries (KI), is one method used to unravel the stories we tell ourselves and release the associated trauma and energy that has been stored in our bodies. This allows us to respond from a more powerful, centered place. For more information, please go to Kiloby.com.

 

Wednesday, June 1, 2016

The Four Agreements



Photo of the Month
Ringling Grounds, August 2015



Surprise!!! It's been a while! A LONG while!

A recent conversation with a friend inspired me to post this. Much of this post had been in draft for a long time. How regular this becomes remains to be seen. 


Some of the following information is from the website:

Don Miguel Ruiz is the author of The Four Agreements. He is from the Toltec tradition, which is a ancient group of scientists and artists, formed to explore and preserve the practices and spiritual knowledge of their ancestors. It is not a religion, but a way of life.... simple, but profound. The practice of the The Four Agreements can help to create love, happiness and most importantly (for me) the experience of personal freedom!

The Four Agreements are:

1. Be impeccable with your word:
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using words to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of the word in the direction of truth and love.

2. Don't take anything personally:
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality or what the author calls their own "dream." When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.

3. Don't make assumptions:
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. Remember, that just as others do not know what you are thinking, you also do not know what they are thinking. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

4. Always do your best:
Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment and regret.


Each of these could be a post in and of themselves, but today I will focus on Agreements #2 and #3. These two go together well and have helped me countless times in my life, especially when it comes to the actions of others. We often make assumptions about what other people are thinking - - and then we take these assumptions personally.

Starting with #3 - Don't make assumptions

We assume first, THAT other people are thinking about us and second, we assume WHAT other people are thinking about us! We often assume that everyone sees life the way we do. We assume that others think the way we think and feel the way we feel.

The TRUTH is that most of the time other people are not thinking about us at all. Most of the time, most people are thinking about themselves.

Freedom comes from understanding this.

Suggestions:
- Be aware of unconscious assumptions - Assumptions are made so fast and unconsciously most of the time that we don't even realize we are doing it.
- Discern the Truth - We make an assumptions, next we we believe that it is the Truth. 
- Assume Nothing - We often assume that others know what we think and we don't have to say what we want. We assume they are going to do what we want because they know us so well. If they don't, we feel hurt. Try to remember that just as others do not know what you are thinking.... you also do not know what they are thinking.

How does this apply to daily life? 

Let's use a simple example... a friend says they will meet you for lunch. That morning the friend texts you to say that they cannot make it... but does not give you a reason. This is the second time this has happened with this particular friend, so you begin to feel annoyed. What is going on? Why is this person canceling - - again? And last minute!

What are you thinking? What are you assuming? Do you think the person is trying to get out of being with you? Do you think the person just doesn't like you? What else? You are probably able to add a few others.
Let's move on....


#2 - Don't take anything personally

I have seen this quote attributed to:Wayne Dyer
Anthony Hopkins and
Michael J. Fox.
So I am not sure who said it initially...
but it was so good that many have repeated it! 
My suggestion is to pretty much disregard the opinions of others. Whatever people do, feel, think, or say, don't take it personally. Other people are going to have their own opinion according to their upbringing and their belief system. Whatever they think about you is NOT about YOU. It is about THEM! If someone says, "I like your blue dress." That doesn't say anything about you. It could say that they like the color blue or that they like that style of clothing.... or that they are trying to be nice today! (Or any number of other things... but I don't want to make assumptions.) Just know that it does not have anything to do with you.

Suggestions:
- Everyone lives in their own "dream" as the author calls it - They are in their own mind... and that can be a completely different world from the one that you live in.
- Be immune to others' opinions - what others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their lives (or their "dream" as Don Miguel Ruiz calls it.) When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.

Let's go back to our example of the friend canceling lunch. What happens after you make the assumption that your friend doesn't like you? You take it personally! You start to question why doesn't your friend like you.... and ask what is wrong with you? What happens next..? 

You start to feel bad.    

Whenever you see yourself doing any of the above...
- Simply STOP and remind yourself that most of the time people are not thinking about you, they are thinking about themselves. 
- It's ok to ask questions if you need to. It is always better to ask questions than to make assumptions. Once you hear the answer to a question, you won't have to make assumptions because you will know the truth.
- Relinquish our own self importance. When we take things personally, we are thinking of ourselves as so important that the other person is also thinking about us. This is an expression of selfishness because we make the assumption that everything is all about "me!"

As always, there is the need to clarify. If someone is offering an opinion to you, I am not suggesting that you be rude or unkind to anyone. It is ok to listen and hear them. It's just it is not necessary to accept their opinions as Truth.   

Let's revisit our example one more time. You run into your friend the next day. She tells you that her grandmother has not been well. She has come to stay with her and she was not able to be alone. Your friend asks if next time maybe you could get take out and come by the house because she has been very tired from care-taking! Was she thinking about you at all? Of course there are nearly infinite explanations....  Even if your friend eventually says something like they don't really see the friendship going anywhere, that is ok too! It is a gift of honesty. Love and respect yourself. You are never responsible for the actions of others, but you are responsible for you. If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. You may hurt for a while, but your heart will heal, eventually... and their decision is still about them! Not you!

Until next month,
Keep it simple!
Penelope

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Life as a Marathon

Photo of the month:
March 2001, Calle Ocho 5k, Miami

Quote of the month:
A journey of a thousand miles 
begins with a single step.
- Lao-tzu

For those of you who have been with me for a while, this is a re-run from quite a while ago.  A friend recently referred to this post in an e-mail, so I went back to re-read it and was amazed at how much it applied, even more today, than it did when I wrote it.  I thought it might be a good reminder for some of you out there too! Enjoy!

Usually I like to take beautiful or inspiring photos to use as the photo of the month. This one may not be beautiful, but hopefully by the end of this post, it will be inspiring. I am using this photo this month because it is me, crossing the finish of my first run. It wasn't pretty.... but I completed the race. Thank you to my friend, Israel, for taking this photo of me back in 2001! I am just to the left of the orange cone wearing a white t-shirt. After this came other runs and longer runs.... but this was the first!

Although I had done some running when I was younger, it was never more than a few miles at a time. During a difficult and challenging time in my life, I took up long distance running, starting with a few 5k's, then a 7 mile and then a half marathon. The running became a metaphor for my life in that.... I could not always see the finish line, but I could always take one more step. All I needed to focus my attention on, was the step I was taking right here, right now, and trust that the finish line was still out there.  It couldn't be seen and I certainly did not know what it would look like.... but I knew that it was there.... at about mile 11 of the half marathon, that became really important!! 

I'll share with you what I learned.... see if any of it might apply to challenges you might face in your own life!

Life is like a marathon!

1 - There may come a time that we decide to do, or have to do something we never thought we would do.... or could do.

I never thought I could run 13.1 miles without stopping! That's for sure! I also never thought I would move across the country one time.... let alone 3 times in 5 1/2 years! Now, I've done both!  2014 update - it is now 4 long distance moves in 8 years!

The lesson here - Don't decide you cannot do something until you at least try!   

2 - You may not be able to see the finish line but you can always take one more step.

As the quote above says, the journey starts with a single step. In a run, it begins with the crack of the gun going off to signal the start of the race. An average person takes 2000 steps/mile - so that would be at least 6200 steps for a 5k!

With a long distance move, there are a lot of steps - showing the house, selling the house, inspections, repairs, signing papers, packing boxes, saying goodbye to dear friends, driving across country with kids and crying cats, buying a house, signing more papers, more inspections, unpacking boxes, changing the car registration, first day at a new school/job, setting up new doctors..... and on and on.... whew... I am getting tired all over again just thinking about it. Looking at all of these steps together may seem overwhelming. Piled on top of each other, it seems like a mountain. It may seem insurmountable. Much as the finish line seems VERY far away in a marathon (or even a half marathon.) Breaking things down into bite size pieces and dealing with them one by one makes it more manageable.

Once you get started, there may come times when you feel like you may not be able to make it to the end. This happened both in life and in running - but I could always take one more step. At step 5124, all you need to do is take step 5125! Don't think about the distance remaining!

The lesson here - As the quote above says, even something that seems insurmountable cannot be completed without starting! No matter how long and complicated an endeavor may be, simply start with the first step and keep taking whatever step you are on.... which leads to #3. 


3 - Be Present in the step you are taking - only this step.

I have written before about being Present or Mindful. In Taking Stock/Mindfulness, from July 2009, I wrote, being mindful simply means that we are paying attention. I used the example of a tight rope walker and how when walking on a high wire, one's attention can be no where else. The walker's full attention is on the step they are taking at that moment, the placement of the foot and where the weight is placed in the foot. In running, I focused on my foot hitting the pavement and stretching my leg for the next step. In moving - I knew I was getting too far ahead of myself when I started to get anxious about what teachers the kids might have or would there be a Target nearby or where would I get my laundry washed? (You know who you are!)  I knew it was time to bring my attention back to where I currently was.

The lesson here - I suggest Presence as often as possible in all aspects of life, challenge or not! 



4 - Even though you can't see the finish line - that is ok - Trust that it is out there.

At the beginning of a 13 mile run, the finish line is no where in sight, nor at the beginning of 1063 mile drive or the packing of the first box. It is natural to want to see it... but accept that you cannot.  Trust! Trust! Trust!  Even if things do not go as planned, Trust that you will find a way to fix it or work it out.  There are few things in life that cannot be fixed.  

The lesson here - It is ok not to know how everything will turn out! Things usually do work out. I often ask.... "What is the alternative? That they won't work out?"  Usually not!  Since the initial writing of this post, there have been things that did not "work out" at least according to my "life plan."   Even when things don't work out in a way that we would have liked, envisioned or anticipated... there are still many positives and knowledge to be gained from these experiences. 

Until next month....
Keep it simple!
Penelope


Sunday, May 4, 2014

50th Birthday/First World Problems



Running in the Water, Orlando, FL, 2001
My younger son has started using the phrase, "Sounds like a first world problem!" I love it! So when I am complaining about my coffee being too cold (or too hot) or the battery on my cell phone going dead, I hear, "Sounds like a first world problem, Mom!" Of course turnabout is fair play, so when he complains about his new video game being too hard or that the Internet went out, I get to say, "Sounds like a first world problem, Son!" : )

In January of this year, there was a chemical spill in West Virginia that contaminated the water source for Elk River, WV for days. Anyone who has been under a boil water order, knows how difficult it is to get along without clean water. We go to the tap and expect it to work, to work correctly and to be clean and sanitary! When something as simple as brushing your teeth becomes a chore, we are less likely to do it regularly and forget about washing dishes... and we might as well just go out to eat!

In short, 
we take clean water 
for granted!!!!!

Same thing when the power goes out. Have you ever walked into a dark bathroom in a power outage, knowing the power was out, but still habitually flipping the light switch only to remain in the dark... "Oh that's right, the power is out!" Reminding myself that this, too, is a first world problem, helps to keep things in perspective.

There are people around the world that do not have this same easy access to clean water or electricity. I recently learned that millions of kids around the world don't live to see their fifth birthday because they don't have access to clean, safe drinking water. We can help change that.

I am turning 50 later this year. I'm not usually overly excited about getting older, but this year I'm really thankful to have spent another "365 days circling the sun," as a good friend says! To mark the 50th anniversary of this occasion I am sponsoring a campaign run by Charity Water (http://mycharitywater.org/my-50th-birthday) to help provide clean water to a community. I wish I could take credit for this idea, but Julian Lennon did it last year for his 50th birthday, so I have to give him credit for the idea.

I'm asking that instead of sending me a birthday card or gift, that you contribute that money to this fund. Even if you were to just buy a birthday card and mail it, I would request that this year, you donate the $3-5 to fund this project instead. You have the option to put your name or not. If you do put your name, I will consider that my birthday card/gift! : ) A celebration of my 50th!  As an extra added bonus... This is also the 100th post on Simply Spirituality!!!! : )

I looked into the charity and there are a number of things I really like about it.
1 --> 100% of the money raised will go directly to the PROJECT that WE fund. This is almost unheard of in the charity world! To find out more click here...
2 -->The charity will follow the project through and provide updates with how the money is spent and how many people it helps. That means we'll know the locations and names of the communities we helped.  If you are interested, you can see more about completed projects here.... http://www.charitywater.org/projects/completed-projects/
3 --> They also provide their charity status and financials here.... http://www.charitywater.org/about/financials.php

Our campaign runs until 
June 18
Our goal is to raise 
$1000

If you would like to contribute, here is the link.....

Help me reach my goal. Please donate to my birthday campaign!
Thank you!
Penelope

Sunday, February 2, 2014

Resolutions vs. Gratitude Jar aka 99th post!!!!



      Photo of the Month:  
      Gratitude Jar 2014
Quote of the Month:

Yesterday ended last night.  
Every day is 
a new beginning.  
Learn the skill of forgetting 
and move on.

- Dr. Norman Vincent Peale


It is February 2nd as I am writing this. How many of you made New Year's resolutions?  Are they still in place?  I stopped making New Year's resolutions several years ago... and simply implement things along the way, as needed, no matter the day.  If you have abandoned yours, follow the advice in the quote above and move on!

I'd like to give all of us something to feel good about next New Year's Day!   Like anything in life, it is a choice of what to focus on or put our attention on that makes all the difference. Instead of feeling badly about our weight, our finances, our job, our work out schedule, eating habits or any other potential resolution topics - at the end of the year, let's focus on all of the good things that happened during 2014.

I wish I could take credit for this idea, but it is not mine.  See the photo above .... starting on the first of the year, or whenever you read this, write good things that happen to you on little pieces of paper.  Above, they suggest surprise gifts, accomplished goals, good memories or the appreciating the beauty of nature.  Then, at the end of the year, maybe on New Year's Eve, read and re-visit all of the wonderful things that happened in 2014. (Yes, the photo is from last year!)  

It doesn't have to be a jar and doesn't have to be fancy.  It could be box or file folder. For me, I need to see it to remember to do it, but if that isn't you, a file on your computer would work too!  I am putting mine in a prominent place where I will see it every day, near my grocery list!

Here are some of my examples....
Jan. 1 - I woke up on New Year's Day at one of my best friend's home with this beautiful view of the Atlantic Ocean! 

Jan. 3 - A good friend took the boys and I out to dinner.  I tried sea bass for the first time and now have a new favorite! 

Jan. 31 - Treated to lunch by my aunt! 

Feb. 2 - My neighbor brought me a unexpected, tasty homemade meal! 

Please post a few of your own examples in the comments

And if you want to make resolutions... that is fine too!  Just remember you get to choose what to focus attention on.  And if you don't end up keeping them, follow Dr. Norman Vincent Peale's advice above and learn the skill of forgetting! : )

Keep it Simple!
Penelope

PS - Yes!  It really is my 99th post! : )